Goodbye My Friend!!!

It's been a while my friend since you left us, but, I believe I am stuck up in an endless ocean hoping against the hope that it's just a bad dream which will get over soon & i will hear your voice again. It feels very empty without you & that last conversation with you, it will always haunt me. I could never imagine in my wildest dreams that , that good-bye on that night would be the final good bye from your end. Life at times gives you surprises in the most cruel way.

3 days it's been since your departure, but, not a single moment has passed in these three days where i have not missed you. I feel frozen & it feels way too much horrible this way.You were a precious friend & always a great listener even if I was blabbering shit at-times when i was drunk.

You introduced me to lot of good things in life & to an extent when i was going through my worst phase in life you were there for me for which i shall always be indebted you. Every-time I try to take one step forward, it has been pulling me 2 steps backwards in the last few days.

13 years of friendship & never in these years i felt as if i was talking to a different guy. On most occasions it felt as if i was talking to the mirror me. I will always cherish those drinking sessions at that VT hotel where you used to take me up, the moment i landed in Bombay. That shanty place was a witness to lot of memories which i have with you.Lot of dreams & aspirations were created in our utopian worldly talks. I will miss all those talks. There was no one else with whom i was this open.

That Pune trip with you shall always be something which i will cherish till the end of my life. During those struggle days the old monk consumed with you must have made Mohan Meakins a little richer. It is said if a friend stays with you in your struggle phases he is bound to stay with you forever You were truly one such friend for me. You were the friend who has seen the worst as well as the best phases of my life & I will always miss those motivational talks when i had failed in my last semester thanks to a stupid break up & when i was crying like a baby. Till 2017 you used to take my case for that incident & I will miss it terribly giving my case to you.

I thought I was strong on the emotional front, but, your death simply broke me down into thousand pieces & i haven't cried so much in a very long time. I hope wherever you are, you just find some peace. i will see you soon my brother. You have left me  in a very bad state. Every-time, I talk about you, I just can't control my emotions. I never expected you to leave so soon. it was a wonderful journey of 13 years with you & you will always be alive in my heart till the time I am alive. The music & the videos created by you shall always be there in my memories forever. You were the best friend I ever had. Rest in Peace my friend, my brother!!!

My Destruction

Sometimes it's okay to let it go,

the thoughts which have been haunting you,

Since the beginning of time, it's journey of a mind,

which is lost forever in your thoughts.

No memory, Just a pain filling up my soul,

Never you gave me any answers,

Just vanished as the dew in the morning,

Leaving me on crossroad leading to nowhere,

But, only in a void of darkness,

From where there is no hope  coming up,

& From where there is no life form taking up.

All what i am left now is a past filled with darkness,

which is slowly & slowly killing me with your thoughts,

Perhaps this is the end of my beginning & perhaps,

this is the start of my destruction & perhaps this is what makes you happy,

I would still be loving you, missing you in every moment which i go through,

Till I bid adios to you!!!

Rider With a purpose!!!

On a cold december night, we ran away together like free birds,

on a trip with just few drinks to share & lot of memories to make,

For the love of hills, we were always cherishing, With You my side,

I feel on top of the world, In the densely himalayas we write our story,

Roaming here & Roaming there we are just humans of the free world!!!

Nights like this, I so wish they never end, when you have a soulmate to talk,

A wish, i so wish was a true one, Life on roller coaster ride like this with you is,

1000 times better than staying lo

st, Everyday it's a new destination, It's a new plan,

On free road, i feel complete, These are the moments i feel i was born for, I am a traveler,

 With a purpose, I am messenger of peace & my karma is to ride free & ride heavy,

nature is my mother & my father & i am here to take a look around the world,

Living a life on roads is my destiny & my desire, A tough life it is, yet so satisfying it is!!!

A journey like this is what keeps me going & it's the thing which makes feel complete

Nomadic, Hipster, Dramatic, Rugged is what they call me, but, i am a traveler, a philosopher,

A observer, a friend, a teacher for the souls who can't afford it & who lay by the road,

I am anti-religion, i am anti-government, I am a rebel, but what makes me the most is what I am,

I am a human, A lover, A free thinker, I am selectively social & I am a tripper, a solo tripper,

Living life on my terms, is what i am made to believe, I am just a rider to everywhere & this palnet,

is my home, My ideologies begin from here & they end here, Everytime i ride, I feel free,

I am a innocence of selfless purpose, I am just a rider with a purpose!!!

These are the moments i feel i was born for, I am a traveler,

 With a purpose, I am messenger of peace & my karma is to ride free & ride heavy,

nature is my mother & my father & i am here to take a look around the world,

Living a life on roads is my destiny & my desire, A tough life it is, yet so satisfying it is!!!

A journey like this is what keeps me going & it's the thing which makes feel complete

Chale hai kuch door apno k sang!!!

Chale hai kuch door apno k sang, farak dekhne se hi pata chalta hai,

Zindagi ek safar hai,ek nasha hai, loota do har ek pal is gulistaan me,

Mastiyon me jiye jao, kashtiyon me doobe jao, har ek lamha jiye jao,

Har ek pal yaadgaar bana lo, phir toh pata nahi kab bhoole kab hum milenge,

Chahaton se hi hasratein banti hai, Apnon se hi banti hai kayanat,

Bhula do un lamhon ko jo sine me dard diye hai, Apna lo har us pal ko jo tum bin,

adhure hai, Caravan hai yeh ek anjaan safar ka, jahan log judte hi chale jaate hai,

Kuch Khamosh bhi hojate hai, Aur Kuch apnon se bhi badhkar hojate hai!!!

Chale hai kuch door hum, yun hi haste hue, Pata nahi kab yeh pal aakhiri ho,

Boond Boond se zindagani banti hai, lamhon se yaadein banti hai, Ji lo, har,

ek paal, yeh haseen hai, Pata nahi kab is kaafir ka bulawa aayega, hum toh,

chal denge us oe, bas tum hume yaad karte rehna apni yaadon me, Kho jayein,

Aise hum Sakhsh nahi, Mit Jayein aisi humari bulandi nahi,

Kuch Boondein Hum pe bhi chidka do is madira ki,

Waqt se pehle naa chodenge saath tumhara,

Chale hai kuch door apno k sang,Chale hai kuch door apno k sang

The Himalayan Dreams

Eventually, after spending almost 10 days in the heart of Himalayas, I have come back to my social prison of city life which some people co-relate as a daily routine of a working class human being, but, on a personal level i feel life in hills was way much more fascinating & peaceful, unlike cities where you have to keep working hard for the loans which you had taken up during your college duration & you are working hard enough to pay the banks back. in the course of time you end up becoming a social slave of the financial institutes which are moulding the societal hierarchy of the system.

This trip of mine was on personal level very much required for giving me a spiritual gyaan which is probably not possible in hustle bustle of the city. When you are in the hills & you are all surrounded by the white snow, a sudden peace hits you deeply which you miss deeply in your city prison life. when you are in hills, half of the town is either an uncle, aunty or a distant relative , unlike cities where you end up searching for your own identity among millions who are also dwindling with you in the same race of self discovering. Spirituality & Philosophy takes a backseat when you try to discover your ownself in cites. In the modern times, relations are majorly conceived on need basis where there is always a give & take phenomena working on somewhere in an individual's mind. The society has surrendered itself to luxuries which money provides, but, in this course of time we end up killing the desires of relatively small happiness like going out for a walk with the loved ones, or having a good meal with the family. Everybody is running towards the money & in this rat race everyone wants to emerge as a winner, but, it's ok even if you don't emerge as a winner, but end up making the individuals close to you happy by giving & spending with them a moment of joy/despair in their
times of need.

After staying & working for almost 3.5 years in big MNCs I have realized that emotions are always on backseat & it's kinda boring to work on the same same issues round the clock. I also had the opportunity to meet some of best individuals whom I know in this life during this time period. It's not as if I am not happy with my job or something, I am way too much happy with the job, but, the kind of happiness i am searching as an individual to get an inner peace is definitely not there in the city life. I think for me that peace lies somewhere in himalayas. Money is definitely one of the few things due to which i am holding myself here in the city, but, i think I need to move beyond it for the search of happiness which i have been looking for. Somethings in life cant be purchased with money. As an individual i had always been more inclined towards nature & it is one of the few things which inspires me the most.

As an individual, I truly wan't to invest my time towards himalayan protection or may be in some sorta eco tourism for making the people aware about the importance of these great mountains which have been protecting us from the beginning of the time. It's a dream for me to start an organic farm where I can grow fresh vegetables & fruits & let the future generation taste something fresh before they get a taste of a burger or a sub. From individualistic point of view i feel home is somewhere where you are happy & surrounded by your loved ones, eve, if you have less money, but, great memories to bring a smile on your face.

With the heavy thoughts of moving into Himalayas for an endless trip, I guess this is the perfect time for saying adios to these heavy thoughts & work more towards achieving the dream of getting lost in the white snow.
   

Unfinished Rituals

Drowning in the solstice thoughts of an under-ocean,

visual disarray running through out the soul when a ,

magnificent ray hits you up in a situation of extreme comatose,

& there will be no sense of guardian against these thoughts,

A shiver so strong builds up inside my heart, A fractal dissatisfaction arises,

When i look into your eyes & the lamented acts of the past rituals hit me up,

Together, those times were the best ones & now its just the faded memories of your touch...

  

Sunday Morning Random Thought!!!

There comes a time when majority of the things of your life seem perfect, yet on some accounts you find a dullness in your daily actions. Surmounted with a sudden loneliness one just tries to adjust with the circumstances of a puppet's life where in at times you act like a robot being controlled by the situations created by your job, your wife, your girlfriend, family, foes etc etc, Yet you end up looking for a smile which has got lost in the ocean of time. Moments of childhood start haunting you as you grow up & as you move forward. Life is one such journey where dreams need to be fulfilled & passion needs to be followed. While as you grow up there comes a time when some people touch you & start dreaming with you in the same boat. Those are the touches of an angle. It's like raindrops touching your face. Happiness has a different meaning when you start sharing it with the loved ones.